A Recipe, Yeah, for Salsa Dancers Though...

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 Anyway, to the day’s business…

Lately, I have read a couple of Salsa blogs and I observed that most of them talk to those in the intermediate and advanced level, which is a good thing because that’s where the audience is: they already know what Salsa is.

Nevertheless, thinking on a different note, I thought about that newly acquainted beginner trying everything they can to dance like those they admire on the floor.

Some even go to an extend of copy pasting the moves into their own daily routines, even if it means twisting your body in a manner it is not used to. Eventually, you can’t blame them when they say that Salsa is as hard as cracking a nutshell with bare hands.

Judging from the way they approach it, you expect nothing less.

Here is the reason; someone told me that for anyone willing to dance well they have to develop their own unique style that synchronizes with their body biology. In that, we dance the same thing but with slightly different modifications.

This is very true.

It is for that reason I compiled a list of tips, all in one recipe that anyone trying to grasp the nuts and bolts of Salsa from scratch would use.

First off, understand and know the basics… 

Yeah, I just said it. I know this isn’t the first time you are hearing this, but basics are the fundamental instruments you will need to advance forward.

It’s more like learning how to speak another tongue, you first learn the basics and then proceed to learn more stuff.

Practice the basics as much as you can, because once you grasp them well, the rest is a walk in the park.

Secondly, take every dance as an entertaining lesson… 

Okay, whether you dance with a beginner or the most advanced Salsa ‘guru’, there will always be something to learn.

And while at it, be keen, it is until then that will you be able to see through the tinted walls of complicated moves.

However, don’t chip in all your attention to learning moves so you forget to have fun. It is through having fun that you will unleash the inner better you in the process.

Because apart from other reasons, that’s the main essence of Salsa: having fun. 

Feel the music… 

I will demonstrate how you can get yourself to feel the music so naturally that you will enjoy every tune played when dancing. So, before you begin dancing, free yourself from distractions.

Distractions don’t necessarily have to be from the surroundings, they could as well be your thoughts. Free yourself from them completely so you are attentive enough.

For the ladies especially when dancing Kizomba, kindly close your eyes if you can and focus your attention to your partner’s cue position.

 After that, use your ears well. Listen to the music so attentively until you feel like it is playing from within you.

You would be like, "Ooh man, cut the crap and stop being ridiculous...!" I know, but it’s real.

The essence of feeling the music is that it helps you dance perfectly with the beat, and most importantly, helps you to synchronize your moves.

Be creative, actually, very creative… 

On watching most advanced dancers dance, you will notice that they rarely implement the basic moves, especially when dancing Kizomba. It’s not like they forget them with time but they know well that the basics give you direction.

And it’s not like you shouldn’t do the basics either, but if you got to break past that basic bracket, creativity has to come in handy. And you don’t have to force it anyway.

Just dance, have fun, be a little crazy… Ooh and have a good memory: don’t forget a classy thing you did yesterday.

Use it today, modify it again and use it tomorrow. I hope you get the point am driving home.

Creativity makes you grow ‘dancewise’. More importantly, it chases boredom, redundancy and complacency away. Just like the way a mob chases a suspected pickpocket.

Last but not the least on our list, watch and learn... 

Be it on the dance floor, or on a YouTube video, always learn a move or two. And here is a fact most forget: always watch and learn to do it your way, unless you are practicing for a routine.

And even so, you still don't have to photocopy everything.

Because it is your way that works perfectly. It doesn’t have to look like you are forcing it just because the move looked awesome that way from where you saw it.

The idea is to dance well like you, not like a crude copy of another dancer.

In summary... we are all entitled to learn from each other. However, we shouldn’t forget that each of us has their unique way of expressing what they learn.

It is through that uniqueness that the beauty in our dancing is displayed.

Always recall, start from the basics and advance forward. Before I call it a day, dear friend, Practice and dance times infinity. Because practice makes you a perfect ‘guru’.

FYI: Spread the Salsa spirit and never stop in the quest to fulfill your dreams. What other tips could you add to the recipe above that could have been left out? Be sure to share them with us on the comment section below.

4 Minor Mistakes, Maybe, But Come to Think of Their Impact...

I have attended a couple of Salsa events and on most occasions, one thing is always crystal clear on the first glance on the dance floor: followers (especially ladies) are twice the number of leads (for my case gents). 

The constant number of dancers lined on the sidewalls or sitting around the round tables confirms my observation.

And the look embedded on their faces says it all; they wish more leads appear from nowhere and even worse, they wish they hadn’t come. 

In as much as I hate to say it, part of the predicament can be blamed on them or their predecessors, for things they did intentionally or inadvertently. 

As nature dictates, the number of gentlemen should equal that of ladies, assuming all conditions are applied equally for both parties. Unfortunately, in most cases, that’s not the case since gents suffer severe challenges inclined to them and since most are not always ready to face it, that marks the end of their budding future in Salsa.

Having said that, the gents who persist and keep up the Salsa spirit eventually become amazing dancers every lady would die to dance with. 

It goes without saying that a big part of being a better Salsa dancer is played by the individual. 

However, situations and environment they are exposed to can as well deliver significant blows to their passion and existence as well.

Allow me to address followers mainly as the ladies and the leads as gents although we still know the inverse is true.

Let’s have a closer look at some of the mistakes leads and followers do and their impact on the beginners as well as remedies to them:

A.    The followers
If you do not do the following then of think of others who do.

i) Turning down a polite dance request blatantly with no reasonable reason.
Most advanced and even intermediate followers don’t do this but there is this lot that proudly does it. 

Unfortunately, most beginners encounter them. 

Sadly, I know this from from experience.

A beginner lead will request for a dance, with no strings attached, but the lady turns it down and immediately goes ahead to merrily accept a request from another dancer.

With that kind of ‘welcome’, it is the last time you will see them on the Salsa hall and sooner you will be complaining about the inadequate number of leads available.

We all know it is the ladies decision on whether to dance or not to with a certain dancer, but in any case you have to turn down a dance request, do it with some level of decency. 

At least give a reasonable reason so that you don’t end up chasing or hurting others feelings or confidence in the process.

ii) Giving completely negative compliments to the beginner leads.
Know this, the beginner knows he is still learning and that’s why he is trying his best to impress you with those ‘crude’ moves as you may call them. 

Serving it hot to him on his face seriously puts him off and kills his motivation and that is the last thing you want to do.
It is completely normal to cringe and frown at every mistake the new lead does but at least make sure to keep that encouraging smile and give encouraging compliments as well. 

Better still, correct them politely where you can.

B. The leads
The leads, in this case, are probably those who have gone past that beginner level and are trying to raise higher.

i) Bragging about your ‘lady appealing prowess’ to beginners
Let’s deal with it head-on, we both know that any experienced Salsa lead especially the gents who commands attention when dancing is a sweetheart to the ladies on the dance floor. 

First off, he knows how to appease them with his expertise and they crave to have a dance with him.
The exact inverse is what is for a beginner. 

Now, bragging about that ‘acquired ability’ can be a passion ‘killer’ for them. In other words, you are telling them that they have failed and dancing is only for a few individuals and not for them.

We completely have no problem with your prowess but why don’t you put your ability to good use by convincing a lady to dance with that neglected beginner. 

This may seem like a miniature act but you literally brought heaven down to them and gave their passion the proper kickstart.

ii) Failure to encourage the discouraged new leads
Most of us just get content with the fact that we are up and going in the course of learning Salsa as far as we are concerned. 

If we all can remember, you can attest to the fact that someone once had to bend down a little to give us the kind of motivation or advice that made sure we stuck to dancing. 

Most don’t bother about that beginner who recently suffered a rejection and respond to it as a normal thing.

It is always a good gesture to look over your shoulder and give the new lead a pat on their shoulder with encouraging words and actions. 

This not only eases the burden off their shoulders but they also have someone to look up to and consult when things go astray.

In conclusion...
It is the high time we took a collective responsibility to make sure Salsa dancing is the best experience even for starters. 

Since there is no limit number to the number of people that should know and join Salsa, I strongly believe we should give everyone an equal, or rather better opportunity to learn and grow. 

If this was done, then Salsa dancing halls and events would surely be the best experiences for everyone. 

It’s not like I’m implying there is no fun, but we both sure as shooting that there are lots of people out there who crave to learn but challenges like those above put them off. 

The be all and end all of Salsa: have fun and let others have fun too.

The above are just but a few of the experiences most go through. 
What are the other sad experiences you went through as a beginner? Be sure to share them with us in the comments section below. 

FYI: Just in case you haven't read: this is the first episode in the series, Story of my Salsa life.

Season 1: Episode 2; The First Real Pisser...

(I dreamt, or rather wished that…)someday that so much didn’t seem to come would eventually come when I could dance like a pro and change the faces of contempt looking at me to those of admiration. It was a tough journey. And the events and happenings that followed proved it.

It shouldn’t surprise you if I confirm to you that when I joined Salsa as a complete beginner, we were a group of committed focused gentlemen determined to make it in dancing but after a span of about two weeks, there were only two of us. Most had absorbed a fair share of the surprises served to them, and they had done the necessary.

For the two of us that remained, no one seemed to notice our continued persistence and resilience so they could at least loosen the rope.

In fact, they rose it a notch higher.

The reason was that formerly as a larger group of beginners, we would share the blows. We would share stories and console one another hence it was more bearable. In fact, I would listen to stories bearing a fate worse than mine. They didn’t console me that much because they were all a direct reflection of my situation.

Anyway, I made a resolution to push on, no matter what because giving up was not an option. I had passed through so much to just give up at this point.

 Maybe the end of the tunnel was a few steps away. Or so, I thought.

 It happened that this one day I went to the Salsa venue. It was a day like any other. Little did I know that there was a bouquet of revelations awaiting the innocent me.

Upon arrival, we did the basics. Okay, in Salsa dancing, it is customary and necessary that before you get to the main business of the day, you practice the basic steps that eventually form the Salsa dancing as a whole. Sometimes as it happens, most people are yet to arrive, especially the “proud gurus”.

So after the basics, the choreographer went ahead to train us the routines which of course the two of us didn’t get.

Then the most dreaded part arrived, open dance. Where people choose who to dance with and who not to.

It was at this point that a certain lady arrived. It didn’t occur to me that we would ever cross roads, she was a pro and so she was definitely out of my league. Immediately she set foot on the dance floor, every gentleman in the room was dying to have the first dance with her.

I was curious to see what she had.

Oh, I didn’t say this, she was pretty and curvy. The kind anyone would wish to be associated with. She had these eyes that seemed to talk to you before she opened her mouth. I saw it when she spoke to her friends.

The first guy to win a dance with her knew the right places to cue her. Because they danced like it was the last thing they had to do on earth.

Believe you me, words can’t explain enough.

It was amazing. Her body was so flexible and she had full control of it. I liked what I was seeing. And I thanked God for giving me eyes that could see so well.

My point is: I really admired every aspect about her. So much to an extent, I wished I could dance with her. Time would tell, though.

I waited patiently till the time she was alone. I guessed she was resting, or rather taking a break.
I approached her with confidence on the cutting edge of a knife, expecting anything. I “hi-ed” her and she “hi-ed” back. And then I went ahead to risk everything, by asking her for a dance.

Like I said before, her eyes spoke even she opened her cute lips. She proudly inquired whether I was a beginner and without hesitation, I gave the only answer I could prove, yes. After that, I wished she hadn’t opened her mouth. Because the words she spoke were a complete ridicule of her nice lips.

"Hey young man, I don’t know where you got the guts to approach me but in the real sense I don’t dance with ‘newbies’, especially not your type. And don’t take this personal: Sitaki kujiabisha nkidance na mtu ka wewe! (I don’t want to shame myself by dancing with a person like you)"

Were it not for the fact that I was leaning on the side wall, I would have dropped down and iced on the spot.

Who in hell and on this earth turns down a humble dance request from a naïve beginner with such intuitive and awfully discouraging utterances? Oh, and did beginners have types? And I shouldn't take this personal? Oh, my… I was heartbroken. Oh no, I was disappointed.

Note that there is no formal way to ask for a dance. And there is no decent way I know to date other than the one I used then. And God knows, I would have tried my best not to shame her.

It wasn’t like I didn’t expect her to reject my dance request. But am sure as shooting there was a better way she could have done it. She could have done way better. Okay, I know am not the most appealing gent on earth, but am not the most disgusting either.


According to me, there were three options she could have chosen from:

•    The first which was way better is that she could have used kind words to pass the same message that she didn’t approve my dance request, while at the same time sparing my morale and esteem.

•    She could have as well given me a tip on the way to do it (I mean, requesting the dance), that is; if she thought I didn’t do it the right. She not only would have helped me but also made a long-lasting friend.

•    Lastly, she would have referred me to a willing friend because it goes without saying she knew one who could help me out.

The fact is, she may have seemed perfect from a far perspective, but on getting a close view of her, I was pissed. And nothing else she could have done after that would change it. Just like my primary school teacher always insisted, I shouldn’t have judged the book by its cover.

I was starting to get hold of the connotative meaning of the saying.

Like any other human being, I recoiled and walked away, thinking. I knew I had promised myself not to give up but the type of blows I was getting were wearing me out.
And they weren’t the type that I had prepared myself for.

I was curious, though. And it is curiosity that kept me going for the times that followed. Because one thing was true for a fact: I had created a vicious enemy who was willing to pierce on my bleeding wounds, no matter what.

I wanted to see what else she got. And she sure had a lot to serve, fresh and sizzling hot surprises were coming.

She took it to a whole new level when…(to be continued.)

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